掏空

掏空 Travelling takes the sanity out of you, and Ive had it up to here, I have to keep writing. Even in my dreams, Im often running or going from place to place, its a non stop chase. Frequently I think of how it would be in my afterlife, and I doubt it will be any different. I will be covering distance & not in a place where I would finally like to settle in. The destination, I wonder, where would it be? Margaret commented that all these is because I dont have my own home. I think its true. Mentality is everything.. My grand purpose is simple, yet the devil is in the details. I had always paid attention to the details, so much that I missed the big picture entirely. This time, Im so hard-headed to meet my purpose, I think the details are killing me by the minute. If only Im free from personal engagament or the yearn of it, Im truly independent. Or, I really mean, the ability to be truly independent. But who loves someone who can live without them? Love, is yet another story.